


Predicament

by Guardinthena



Series: Transformers: Resurgence [2]
Category: The Transformers (Cartoon Generation One), Transformers Generation One
Genre: F/M, Family Drama, Family Dynamics, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-08
Updated: 2020-08-08
Packaged: 2021-03-05 21:33:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,129
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25782184
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Guardinthena/pseuds/Guardinthena
Summary: One-shot. While the Autobots are visiting the Witwicky's property to gather spare parts, Optimus Prime ends up drawn into an unprecedented conversation with patriarch Radar in regards to the recent scandal of Astoria Carlton-Ritz's romantic relationship with Autobot Powerglide, the myriad ways the Autobots can use their holoforms, and the virtue of his daughter, Alicean.
Relationships: Astoria Carlton-Ritz/Powerglide, Optimus Prime/Original Female Character(s)
Series: Transformers: Resurgence [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1881652
Kudos: 18





	Predicament

**Author's Note:**

> Easter Eggs: The alien population on Saturn's moon Titian appeared in the G1 episode, 'The God Gambit.' The Sub-Atlanteans attacked humanity in the G1 episode, 'Atlantis, Arise!' And Powerglide fell in love with the American socialite Astoria Carlton-Ritz in the G1 episode, 'The Girl Who Loved Powerglide.' I needed additional humans that live and grew up beside the Witwickys, so I have moved the Burns family from Transformers Rescue Bots to G1, as a result the Burns family now lives in Oregon serving as the local human rescue services. Sparkplug's 'former business' refers to the Marvel comics of G1, where Sparkplug ran an auto repair shop named 'S. Witwicky Auto Repairs and Tow Service.' Lastly, the ancient Peru temple ruins mentioned refers to the G1 episode, 'Fire in the Sky.'
> 
> A note about Spike and Buster Witwicky's personalities. I draw largely from the G1 canon for Spike's personality, where he was shown as a more sensitive soul in regards that he wrote in journals about his experiences with Cybertronians but was known to flirt with about every girl that entered the show. In the G1 comics created by Marvel, Spike's character was replaced by 'Buster,' who was Spike in the cartoon. They both were sensitive intellectuals, and it was not until later, due to the popularity of the cartoon, that the Marvel comics tried to retcon Spike into the comics by claiming he was Buster's older brother who had been off at college. The Spike in the Marvel comics was more the jock of the two, and became heavily involved in the Autobot-Decepticon war while Buster left the scene. In my AU, I have attempted to fix/rework this bit of character confusion. Spike is largely his sensitive, intellectual, journal-keeping, sporty self while his older brother, Buster, is a cocky, instigating jock (with personality characters that closely resemble Kade Burns, interestingly enough.)

A rare sunny summer day in Oregon saw Optimus Prime, Bumblebee, Ratchet, and Ironhide visiting Radar Witwicky's four acreage of property. The Witwicky home was custom-built, a lavish Victorian style abode designed to be the forever home of Richard 'Radar' Witwicky's branch of the family. The house proper was situated on a grassy hill with sweeping green fields sprawling out from it in all directions before ending at a stark, dark treeline of firs and cedars. The hill and back half of the house had been terraformed over the years into Mrs. Witwicky's ideal garden with blooming flowers, fruit trees, and an enclosed vegetable garden with seven foot tall lattice walls to prevent the elk from jumping over and eating their hard grown labors.

Optimus Prime could not forget the first time they had come to the private property, nor Mirage's relieved remark that their newfound alien allies were clearly wealthy elites and then his immediate cultural shock when the Witwicky's had informed them it was the combined benefits of a life-long military career and Mrs. Witwicky's real estate career, and that they weren't as wealthy as Mirage assumed they were. They had only planned ahead and made smart moves with their fiances to ensure a secure, lasting future for themselves and their daughter, Alicean.

While Ratchet was off scavenging for supplies on the corner of the property that Radar had graciously allowed his brother Sparkplug to utilize as an extension of his junkyard from his former business prior to the Autobot's arrival, the remainder of the Autobots were enjoying the rare moment of quiet. Ironhide was barking off real laughter as Bumblebee played football with Spike and Buster in the wide open grassy field that were broken up by a single solitary old gnarled oak tree. Lounging on one of the highest and yet still sturdy branches was Alicean Witwicky, busy doodling away in her sketchbook. And beside Ironhide stood Optimus Prime and Radar Witwicky, all three on the opposite side of the rustic wooden fence that marked the boundary for the fields and the road.

Half of Prime's attention was divided between enjoying the peace and worrying if Alicean would fall from the oak tree. "Is it safe for Alicean to be up there?" Worried Prime aloud.

Radar made a noise at back of his throat then puffed on his cigar and exhaled. "I'm more worried about my nephews getting squished by Bumblebee."

"He would not allow that to happen."

"Sure." Grumbled Radar. "As if accidents needed permission."

"The same could be said for Alicean's situation."

"I've been telling her since she was old enough to climb to stay out of the tree. Eighteen years and never once listened to a word I said. She's fallen, scraped and bruised herself before and _still_ she climbs up the damn thing. And all for it, she knows every inch of that damn oak and what branches are the safest. So, she's _fine_ , Prime."

"Hm."

"Actually Optimus Prime, there's something I've been meaning to ask." Said Radar suddenly before he took a drag on his cigar and exhaled the smoke around his words. "See, I'm in a predicament."

Despite Radar Witwicky muttering around his cigar, Optimus caught every word. Bright summer sunlight caught and reflected off of Optimus Prime's metallic physique as the towering, bio-mechanical transforming titan shifted his weight to acknowledge the much smaller organic entity that was the elder Witwicky brother. The situation was, perhaps, a little ironic for Radar himself who towered over most other humans at six feet and five inches.

"I am honored that you have come to me for assistance." There was a hint of light-hearted humor in Prime's soothing baritone cadence. "What is your predicament, Radar?"

The older Witwicky plucked the cigar out of his mouth between his fingers and exhaled. "My daughter."

One of Prime's optical ridges inched slowly up his forehead. His optics flickered briefly to the only female offspring of the Witwicky family unit and once more scanned the dense treeline of firs and cedars over as if attempting to discern hidden threats. Briefly, his attention swept over to Ironhide. The red mech had become silent, a tall imposing statue in the green field of Radar's lawn. He caught Prime's optics and gave a nearly infinitesimal shake of his cranium in the negative that conveyed a plethora of things to Optimus Prime all at once- There were no Decepticons. Ironhide had detected none. They were safe for the time being.

Somewhat puzzled, Optimus turned his attention back to Radar Witwicky, who had to crane his neck to observe him with his own cold poker face.

"Alicean?" Questioned Prime.

"I don't have another." Radar drew the bunt back to his lips but didn't take it in. The silver-haired veteran always had the tendency of reminding Optimus Prime of a plethora of Autobot soldiers who had taken a fixing to cygar's. The resemblance and, as he understood the device's effect, were uncannily similar. Optimus had never personally approved or understood the desire to clog one's own air filters.

"What seems to be the predicament? My scanners do not detect trouble."

" _Tch!_ " Snorted Radar. "The _trouble_ is that she's growing into a beautiful young woman and there's this upstart that's been eyeing her." At the news, Prime's optics narrowed on Radar with rapt attention. "This fella comes and hangs around often, chats her up all prettily and makes her promises to take her out places, and you know what? The damn bastard follows through." Radar puffed on the cigar and exhaled slowly, deliberately drawing the moment out.

The information only served to baffle Optimus Prime even further. When it became clear Radar was waiting to be prompted, Prime began carefully, "I was not aware that Alicean had taken a boyfriend. I understand that it is a natural drive for humans to seek a companion, but the ramifications of human dating affects a lot of factors for us. I will have to inform Prowl of the development, to make sure that this other human is protected. Why, Spike alone has given Prowl processor aches to keep up with which femme he is currently dating."

Radar chuckled and grinned around his cigar. "I keep telling Sparkplug that that boy is a lover and not a fighter."

"When _are_ these dates happening?" Questioned Optimus with deeply crumpled optical ridges. "Between her schooling and time spent at the Ark under my protection, I cannot begin to piece together a timetable for these outings. I am only further baffled that she has not said anything about them."

The light grin slipped from Radar's face. He scoffed and puffed on the cigar in a fit of agitation. "I don't believe she sees themselves as a pair." Grumbled the man irritably as he alternated between puffing and exhaling the toxic fumes. "She likely sees him as being a good friend, but you and I both know how naive she can be."

Optimus decided that Radar's mood was in part his own fault for his naivety in the goings on in the Witwicky daily routine. "I would like to apologize, Radar. I thought our surveillance of the area was foolproof. That something as benign as this has happened gives me concerns that Decepticons could have easily infiltration the area without our foreknowledge. I will have to speak with Red Alert about-"

"It isn't anybody new." Interjected Radar rudely.

Optimus blinked, momentarily baffled and caught off guard that someone had interrupted him. He glanced aside to Ironhide, as if the mech could confirm the information. But his loyal bodyguard was tight-lipped, a solid mountain against the backdrop, silently listening in with rapt attention while pretending to remain engrossed in the game of football between Spike, Buster and Bumblebee. Realizing he would get no help from Ironhide, Optimus turned back to Radar and nodded once, a regal thing, and added thoughtfully, "Is it Graham Burns? I have heard his designation mentioned whenever Buster is teasing Alicean about their compatibility. If the Decepticons believe he is becoming involved in our affairs I will have to consider assigning an Autobot detail too-"

"No."

"No?"

Radar's eyes had become half-hooded after the fashion he took while running counter intelligence against the Decepticons and reaffirmed tersely, "No."

A peculiar silence pervaded that put Optimus on an odd field. He was not certain if the 'no' had meant that it was not Graham Burns that was coming around to woo Alicean, or if the 'no' had been meant to not involve the boy any further in Autobot affairs than he already was. Optimus was just of a mind to demand a clarification when Radar finally elaborated, "It isn't Graham. Though I wish it _were_. I like the boy, at least. This other fella, not so much. I've had some pretty...intense conversations with him already."

"Are we speaking of Graham's older brother then? Kade Burns?"

"Hah! No."

"...Is it Dani Burns?"

Radar plucked the cigar out of his mouth and cast Optimus a long, disbelieving glare. After a disturbed moment, Radar responded with a harsh, "No."

"I am at a loss then. Who is this suitor and do you suspect he would do her foul?"

"You know, I can't say if he would do her foul. And that has me on edge. I want to hate the fella. He thinks he can just _roll_ into our lives and take my daughter away from me. But damn it all, I can't find a reason to dislike him. He's what all the girls go on about - _tall_ , _handsome,_ I suppose, but I wouldn't say dark. More _red_ _and blue_ \- real _patriotic_ fella. He has his shit together. Nice guy, _commanding_ persona, boss of his work even."

"At eighteen?" Questioned Prime incredulously, while Ironhide tried to disguise a laugh as a cough and then promptly tried to pull a Mirage and disappear without going anywhere. His behavior just baffled Optimus all the more while his ignorance seemed to irritate Radar in equal turn.

"He's older." Radar gruffed and grumbled. " _Much older._ And see, it's that that I can't wrap my head around."

Prime stared down long and hard at Radar, while the elder Witwicky met his stare with his own angry glare.

"I am confused." Optimus admitted at length. "I cannot see Alicean willingly going out on social interactions with an older man of her species. It is not like her. Nor would _you_ permit it. That aside, is it not human law that such interactions would be considered illegal? ...Wait."

A stare down ensued between the Witwicky patriarch and Optimus Prime. The Prime had become as still as stone. So too, was Radar. Gradually, Optimus Prime's optical ridges slanted downward as the pieces clicked together.

"This is one of those father-suitor conversations I have seen on Earth's television dramas, isn't it? And I am this hypothetical suitor."

Radar let the cigar drop and crushed it under his heel. "You know Prime, I was going to let it slide."

Optimus blustered up just as Radar was getting going. "Let _what_ slide-!?"

But Radar went right on talking over him, going into a full rant. "-I figured it was some weird, harmless fascination but I knew Alicean was safest with you. The closer you are to danger and all that rubbish. But my perception of your dynamic changed when that crazy socialite _Astoria Carlton-Ritz_ shacked up with Powerglide and suddenly the media looses their god damn minds. There's all this nonsense talk about their relationship. The usual garbage." His tone became sarcastic as he continued. " _Interracial_. _Cradle robbing_ and _robbing the grave_! Hah! _Imagine_ that one for me please...Astoria is what? Twenty-one? Twenty-four? Maybe? And you 'bots are _millions of years old_. Do you know _how_ that translates to humans? Because it _doesn't_. At best, it is as relatable as a teenage trashy vampire novel, and that's half of how the general public is laughing at it. But to the rest of the population, they _can't_ process their relationship. So they become _trolls_. There are protest groups _expressing their concerns_ for their children's future because the general public realizes the holomatter avatars aren't as innocent as they were led to believe. But of course it's Astoria Carlton-Ritz. She doesn't just snub the media and the public, she makes her relationship with Powerglide _a whole goddamn show_. She's reveling in all the attention, Prime, and likely making money off of it soon enough if not now. And because of Astoria, because of my family's close ties to you lot, we've been heavily targeted for hate. My _fatherhood_ has been criticized. I've seen news outlets calling Alicean's sweetheart persona a _sham_. I'm damn well near pressing defamation charges against a multitude of peoples! For the damn cherry on top, their public relationship has all the damn lawmakers and politicians in a mess trying to figure out how to go about writing _laws_ to address dating alien species with longer lifespans than humans. Have you gotten _that_ memo on you desk yet, by the way? I heard they needed to _talk to you directly_ about what's considered appropriate for your species. Absolutely ridiculous. You're _machines_."

Through the whole tirade, Optimus's countenance continued to darken. Over his communique, Prime received a private message from Ironhide. /And you laughed when Powerglide admitted he was smitten with Astoria. I told you it would be trouble./

/Not now, Ironhide./

"Frankly, it's long overdue. Since your activation, you've shaken humanity to its foundations more times than I care for! _First,_ your arrival, _then_ the discovery and attack of the Sub-Atlanteans, _and then_ the bronze-age sentient species you lot found on Titian! Earth shaking revelations like that usually come every few centuries, not one after the other! Each one has had the shock as if we've discovered the New World! And now, _now, because of Astoria Carlton-Ritz,_ I have to re-evaluate Alicean's relationship with all of you!"

"So..." Drawled Optimus Prime with a rumbling, heavy cadence. "Your _predicament_ is cemented in how you are performing as a father in an age when humanity is changing."

"This is about Alicean and you."

"Is it?" Challenged Prime. "Radar, I have listened to you, as I have in the past, and you are clearly over stressed and overreacting to this situation. I kindly suggest that you obtain some recharge. Perhaps disconnect from your media's toxic sensational news and take the Witwicky camping trip early this year."

"Do not deflect this conversation."

"Radar." Thundered Prime, feeling very much like he was talking to Red Alert during one of his paranoid breakdowns. "I insist you take a step back to analyze the steps that have led you to this faulty logic. In your...overzealous presumptions, you have insulted me by insinuating that I would dare engage in an illicit affair with Alicean."

"I have just said what has led me to my conclusions."

"How on _Cybertron_ does Astoria and Powerglide's _consensual_ relationship have to do with your erroneous logic that I am involved with Alicean?"

Radar went red in the face and snarled. "You spend _too much_ time with her. Beyond picking her up from school and transporting her to the Ark, you also bring her along with you when you leave the Ark for your casual outings. Sometimes you're both gone for hours. Doing what? Is it really merely the platonic cruising along the scenic routes you've led me to believe?"

"Yes." Growled Prime. "For Primus's sake, Radar. I am _not_ romantically involved with Alicean. She loves traveling, you know that. She comes along to enjoy the scenery."

"The paparazzi are going to talk, Prime. Astoria is a power icon in America! She sets trends for impressionable young women to follow. The situation is worse because Alicean knows the woman! They're already making suggestions."

"Improper suggestions you are clearly misinterpreting as fact."

"It doesn't help that Jazz is off with some new _lady friend_ every few months! With this Astoria-Powerglide debacle, how long before the women Jazz has knocked shoes with in his holoform come forward for their fifteen minutes of fame?"

At that, Ironhide choked on another short of a laugh and quickly pinged Prime with another message. /We're going to have to talk to Jazz about that one./

"You are drawing connections that are not there, Radar."

"Am I?"

"I am _not_ after your daughter, Radar." Remarked Optimus Prime thunderously and brusquely. "I am merely her guardian, just as Bumblebee is to Buster and Spike. And if Alicean were to loose her mind, I would not permit the situation from occurring in the first place."

"Good." Radar snapped back. "Because if you _were_ I'd get Sparkplug to disassemble your ass."

"Duly noted." Prime rumbled irritably and punctuated with a rev of his engine.

"Thing is though Prime," Radar continued after the briefest of respites, "You're lying to me. Maybe not now, but you are."

Optimus's good humor had long evaporated and was reflected in his dark countenance and terse speech. "First you insult my honor by insinuating that I would engage in an illicit affair with your daughter, and now you are calling me a _liar_?"

Ironhide stepped out from around Prime, so that Radar had clear view of the red mech. His accent was thick as he spoke heatedly in his Prime's defense. "Ah don't think even Red Alert has purposed anythin' so ridiculous, and _that's_ sayin' something. To save what's left of Prime's respect for you, Radar, I would apologize quick and back off."

Radar just got redder and redder in the face, growing more stubborn as Ironhide entered the dispute. "Honor, _please_. No man _ever_ on the face of this Earth or _any other_ invests as much time as you have with my daughter and expects a platonic relationship in the end. I can't figure out the why of it. So explain that shit to me. What does a thirty foot tall sentient machine get out of a relationship with a woman like Astoria- or more importantly, my daughter. If I find out you bots have some B-rated horror movie plot to con the girls into mind jumping into female mechanical bodies like the Autobot Spike incident-"

" _Radar_." Prime's voice was hard. "There is _no_ plot."

"For a species that lives for millions of years how do _you_ resolve the age gap conflict, assuming you even have the equivalent of a sexual relationship. I assume there's _something_ , unless Powerglide and Jazz are just thrill seeking with their holoforms for some new experiences. Hell if I know what any of you are thinking a quarter of the time."

"Since this is going to be an issue, it would seem to me the only way to solve your predicament is to remove myself as Alicean's guardian and install another Autobot as her newly appointed protector."

"Now wait-"

"That _is_ your grievance is it not, Radar? Would your conscious be eased if Bumblebee resumed his former duties as the guardian of all the younger Witwicky's? Or, due to the former issue with Bumblebee, shall I appoint Sideswipe? However, given your grievance, placing any one of my loyal and honorable Autobots seems a damned course of action in your eyes now."

"Don't pull the damned honorable card with me. It was a load of crap when it was invented and remains so today. So why deflect such a simple question with such a less than subtle threat, Prime? _How_ _do_ Cybertronians resolve the age gap?"

"We don't." Radar cocked an eyebrow at Ironhide's interjection into the conversation. "It's considered taboo to inquire after someone's conjunx endura."

"A _what_? What is that? Your word for significant others?" Radar grunted and glared heatedly between the two of them. "We've been allies for, what, six years now and never once was this mentioned that you lot even take on or consider others for wives. Or..." he glanced between the mechs and they could practically see his brain trying to make sense of the new information. "Whatever. It. Is. ...How _would_ that even work for you species? You're machines."

Ironhide glared down on Radar and growled, "There's a lot we don't have to disclose to you."

"Stand down." Murmured Prime. "Radar." Began Optimus renewed, "If Ironhide's answer does not satisfy, as I know it will not your politicians, than perhaps this one will. As Cybertronians live near indefinably, we do not consider age as humans do, but more experience. What does age matter if a Cybertronian has whittled millions of years away doing nothing, compared to another that has gained knowledge, experience, and wisdom by living fruitfully? In that regard, before the war, it was generally frowned upon for elder Cybertronians to engage with vorners due to an experience gap rather than an age gap."

"And the war changed that why?"

"Life expectancy became as short as a sword's edge for most. As such, for some, gaining experience became something of a race. In my time, I had met vorners who had more experience than other Cybertronians pre-war that had wasted their lives sipping energon and pretending that was experience that gardened them the right to rule. ...I can tell my answers are upsetting you further, Radar. It is not my intention."

"But it is." Snarked the man as he ruffled a hand through his silver hair. "So then Powerglide and Astoria doesn't bother you in the least."

"No. By your species laws, Astoria is a fully grown adult capable of her own choices. Obviously Powerglide is as well. Therefore, they are two consenting individuals entering into the relationship willingly."

"But Astoria clearly has less experience than Powerglide." Nor Prime or Ironhide said nothing, but remained towering over Radar and staring down at the man with their bright blue optics. Radar's hand went to his mouth then looked flustered when he realized he'd already did away with the cigar. "So my daughter."

"Yes?" Clipped Prime darkly.

"What are you two fighting about now? I hate it when the two of you fight."

Optimus suppressed a jump at the sound of Alicean's voice. All three turned as one, surprised to find that Bumblebee, Spike, Buster, and Alicean were cutting a line across the grassy field toward their position. Alicean had placed herself in the lead of the procession, carrying her sketchpad and pencils under one arm, while a sweaty Spike and Buster and energized Bumblebee formed her trailing phalanx.

When they drew nearly, Prime asked with an air of polite conversation, "Were we voicing our grievances loudly again?"

Alicean quirked one of her eyebrows high on her forehead. "Only just."

"Hm."

"Where did you lot spring from?" Exclaimed Radar moodily.

"From hell." Replied all three Witwicky teenagers as one. Spike, Buster, and Alicean glanced between each other at the unison reply, then burst out laughing and then fist bumping.

Radar pulled a face and grumbled. "More like hell of a lot of trouble."

"Love you too, dad." Grinned Alicean cheekily.

Radar just rolled his steel grey eyes. "How did I end up with a smartass for a daughter."

"Did you look in the mirror this morning, dad?"

Ironhide, Spike and Buster burst into a round of rowdy laughter that had Alicean blushing and re-evaluating her words under the attention and her father's indiscernible look. Bumblebee came to her save by inquiring quickly to Prime, glancing up at the much taller mech with his wide blue optics. "What's all the hubbub about, Prime? Is there Decepticon activity?"

"No." Said Prime brusquely.

"They were only discussing what would happen if Prahme removed himself as your guardian, Alicean." Supplied Ironhide, coming to both patriarchs saves.

"What?" Exclaimed Alicean sharply. "Why?"

"Oooh." Snickered Buster. "This have to do with Astoria's scandal?"

"What scandal?" Questioned Alicean. Prime cast Radar Witwicky a long shadowed look that only made Radar's face flush red.

Spike too was blushing hard. "Err, don't watch the news for the next three months, okay cuz."

"You _realize_ that just _makes_ me _want_ to look, right Spike?" Huffed Alicean, turning her head so sharply that her high pony tail of wild brown locks whipped out around in an arc. It was an action that Buster and Spike were so used to that when it happened, Buster was already leaning away to prevent getting whacked in the face. "So just tell me now, what's going on?"

"Just...stuff that's going to make you mad." Supplied Spike with a bumbling air as he scratched at the back of his sweaty, curly mop of hair.

"Oh." Demurred Alicean. "Isn't that just...news then?"

"Yeah, so don't worry your head over it." Said Spike.

Alicean turned imploringly to her father and Optimus Prime. "What's happened, Op? Don't tell me the Decepticons destroyed another historical site."

"I certainly hope not." Grumbled Buster, "You were ridiculous over the last one."

Immediately, Alicean's temper flared. Her jaw set and she stamped her foot as she whipped around on Buster, this time causing Spike to have to swerve to avoid the sting of her high-end pony tail. "You just don't get it! They were irreplaceable historical ruins!"

"Oh, I get it." Shrugged Buster flippantly. "They're a pile of old rocks in Peru."

"I. Don't. Care- _Where they're at_!" Alicean snapped back. "Loosing any portion of our _joint human history_ to something as stupid as wonton destruction is a _travesty_! The temple in Peru stood for centuries and we can _never_ regain back what was lost!"

"See? Like I said, you get ridiculous over this stuff. What's stuff that happened centuries ago in a foreign country have to do with me?"

 _"EVERYTHING!"_ Alicean shouted shrilly. "Our family has roots in Ireland and half of Europe! For gods sake, great-great grandma Witwicky fled Poland in World War II! Heck! The development of the English language you speak took place centuries ago!" Abruptly, Alicean sucked in her breath and held it, summoning enough willpower to suppress her temper but her face still contorted into a tight, angry countenance. Through clenched teeth, she managed to clip angrily. _"How. Are. We. Related."_

"I'm his brother and I've wondered the same." Mumbled Spike.

Alicean's hazel eyes darted between Spike and back to Buster. Her eyes lit with realization and her jaw set. "You're _doing_ this just to get a _rile_ out of me!"

"It's pretty funny, actually."

"Ahrag!"

"Buster!" Snapped off Radar in his commanding, fatherly tone. "Knock it off before I knock some sense into you and see if your father doesn't bat an eye. Alicean-chill pill!"

"Aaaaand that's my cue." Interjected Bumblebee good-naturedly as he physically placed himself as a barrier between Alicean and Buster and gently pushed the two apart. "You both stay on your separate sides. If only the war could be resolved so easily."

"Hah!" Scoffed Ironhide.

While Alicean stood with her arms crossed and glaring moodily at everything, Buster was trying his damnest not to snicker. Cautiously, Spike edged around Alicean and inquired, "So, uh, is there some mission you guys have to run off to, Prime? Is Bumblebee going too or is he gonna watch out over the three of us again?"

"Yes, Radar." Redirected Prime stately. "Who _would_ become Alicean's new guardian to oversee her welfare against Decepticon _or_ human threat if not myself? You were only just saying you felt she was safest with me. Is there another Autobot you felt qualified? I will take your consideration into account."

Alicean's eyebrows knitted together. "Wait, are you talking about leaving me without a guardian? Dad, you can't be serious right? You won't let Optimus do that right? Not after what happened last year."

"I would not want to leave you without a guardian, Alicean. Or any of the Witwicky family for that matter. Your father was only just expressing concern over hypothetical predicaments."

Radar himself had gone stiff, quietly simmering for being drawn into a corner and said tightly. "Yes. Right...Everything's... _fine_ , Allie. You won't go without a guardian."

"So, why the talk?" Asked Alicean.

"Indeed." Said Prime primly, his attention focusing on Radar.

"Well! I got what I need!" Announced Ratchet sharply and abruptly as he came around the corner of the Witwicky home, carrying spare parts in his arms acquired from Sparkplug's junkyard on a corner of the property. "I'm ready to roll out, Prime."

/I messaged him, Prime./ Scrawled Ironhide's text message across Prime's visual window.

Regally, Prime drooped his cranium from Ratchet as the mech promptly crossed the field and back to Radar. "If this conversation is over..."

"For now." Grumbled Radar.

"Then let's roll out for the Ark." The Autobots transformed on cue and by long standing routine, Spike and Buster filed into Bumblebee while Alicean cut a grateful beeline for Prime's open cab.

"Alicean." Cut Radar's voice through the air, making the teenager pause half way up climbing into Prime's open cab. She blinked owlishly at her father as he just stood there, conflicted. "Yeah, dad?"

Radar set his jaw. "Think you can ride with Bumblebee?"

She blinked innocently back. "But, I can see everything from Prime's cab."

Buster all but burst back out from Bumblebee's driver side door. "I'll ride in Ironhide!" And before anyone could stop him, the eldest of the Witwicky teenagers practically ran the short distance to Ironhide and nearly leapt in through the passenger side door and scooted into the driver's seat. Within Ironhide's interior, Buster had a impish grin on his face as he commented, "Man, leave it to Uncle Radar to make things awkward."

"You know what's going on?" Asked Ironhide, his voice emanating from all around the cab interior.

Buster just went on grinning like an idiot. "Of course." He said, ducking to get a perfect view of the exchange outside the windshield between Alicean, Radar, and presumably Prime. "It's not rocket science, but Allie's just such an air head. Man, Uncle is so weird sometimes. But so are you 'bots, too. I mean, come on!" Laughed Buster. "What is Powerglide thinking? Dating a human? I don't get it. Is it some new weird publicity stunt thing that Optimus is putting on for human-Cybertronian relations? Because it's a joke. I mean, come on. Like you guys have _those_ kind of relationships."

Ironhide made a low, grumbling non-committal growl from his engine, but Ironhide's disgruntled disposition went right over Buster's head. "Oh man!" Buster cackled. "Uncle Radar's riding with the both of them! Hahaa! Geez, I can't _wait_ to tell dad about this one. I swear, Uncle Radar gets weirder and weirder every year."

"Hey, Buster."

"Yeah, Ironhide?"

"Could you mute your vocal processor for the remainder of the ride."

Taken aback, Buster blinked at the dashboard console screen where Ironhide's face had appeared. "Oh, uh, sure. ...Will there be music at least?"


End file.
